MoxieLife

Need Resolution Motivation

Are you feeling a little overwhelmed by the process of making resolutions? Do they seem silly anyway? Here are some sources that might help you out.

From my favorite newspaper of all time: The Los Angeles Times, 52 Ways to Leave Your Blubber: "This is the year you will resolve to ditch the diets, the "all or nothing" mentality and the "no-pain, no-gain" fitness goals. This is the year you will resolve to use common sense to eat less junk food, move more — and have fun doing it."

I'm in love with: (9) Eat all the raw, non-starchy vegetables you can stand.

For those looking for a theme, perhaps the One Little Word will help motivate you. (Registration for the workshop ends December 31st)

Maybe you need some accountability. Buster Benson is delivering that in his Rabbit Rabbit Resolution Accountability Squad. "Want to try something fun and different for new year’s resolutions this year?" I'm doing Move My Body for 30 Minutes Everyday. No Excuses.

Need ongoing support? Head over to ZenHabits and get hooked on Leo. 

Photo Credit: One Charming Party (The CUTEST!)

 

My One Word for 2013

Since 2008 our family has been choosing a theme and we may still, but I have also been choosing words for myself. Sometimes those words have great meaning all year or they fade out. This year the word FOCUS just kept sticking into my mind. I am easily distracted sometimes. By people, ideas, opportunities, moods, etc and this year, instead, I want to focus.

I want to focus writing.

I want to focus on design.

I want to focus on taking better photos.

I want to focus on meditation.

I want to focus on doing embroidery as my one craft.

I want to focus on health and fitness.

I want to focus on quality time with friends.

I want to focus on my relationship with my husband.

I want to focus on diving deeply into simple living.

I want to focus on doing good work.

It seems like a lot to focus on, but really they are all things I want to bring attention to in my life. Not to get all new agey, but I truly believe where we spend our time is where we see success. It is a pretty simple formula. 

I am considering doing the one little word project, or going it alone. Either way I am excited to bring focus into my life this year and see where it takes me.

Do you have a word for your coming year?

Photo taken at the AMAZING Therapon party organized by Evolved Mommy.

 

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The Top 12 of 2012 Here at Moxie

It looks like I wrote over 200 blog posts this year - not bad. When I was going through them I realized that what I write about, mostly, is the heart. You might even call in Inspiration writing if it were catagorized in a book store. Funny, I never set out to write like that, but it is what flows through me.

Here were the best (according to me and what gets read the most) of 2012:

Embracing Y'all - I lucked out. I ventured out of California into the Mid-South and was able to slip into Y'all country. A friendly place where everyone is greeted on the same playing field, where it doesn't matter if you are a woman or a man - at least in the greeting!

My 5 Step Change/Disappointment Practice or How to Breathe Into Change - How do I work with change? How do I learn to relax into life instead of holding on to it with a death grip like a triple upside down roller coaster? How do I not get shaken and stirred by every wrong turn and bump I hit along the way?

Valuing Friends - And when those crappy moments happened I realized that I couldn't just call up my friends and whine.

Not Getting Swept Up in Anger - We all get angry. I experience it just like a fever - it rises in me until my ears are throbbing. It is as if an alien has entered my body and is taking hold and then just as soon as that happens it can vanish (that is one tricky alien.)  

Not Defending Mine - Today I have been thinking about the need to respond, defend, or say something. Do we really need to? All of the time?

What I Know About Controlling Other People - Lately, I have been thinking a lot about our need/desire to control other people. Our spouse, friends, volunteers, family, employees, etc. We all have the feeling underneath that we want people to do things a certain way. We want them to march in line - our line, to our rhythm, to our drummer. 

Shirking My Responsibility - Sometimes I want to shirk my responsibility. I want to lay it all down and give up. It seems like too much. It is on those kinds of days that I remember to just do the simple things.

Broken and Filled - My heart is broken by the loss but filled with the outpouring of love. It is with shock and dismay that I come to grips with the fact that my sister has died.

Giving Each Other A Little Grace - What if we were to act with kindness and compassion - clarity and integrity with every interaction. 

I Found My Tribe - I have, for years, been looking for my tribe. Women who are similar to me, who are interested in living open full lives, you are moving forward and creating community.

Free Presidential Debate Bingo Cards - It's that time of year! Debate season! For those of us who are sadly so geeky that watching the debate is what we consider a hot date with our sweetie I made these little bingo cards!

Why I Share - Lately, I have been thinking a lot about why I keep this personal blog up and running.

 

 

 

The Gift of Learning to Laugh at Myself

This is totally not for kids. Be warned. This is a story where I finally got that being able to laugh at myself feels great. 

For Christmas I had downloaded the game Cards Against Humanity and had my favorite local printer make a set for our daughter. For those that don't know, it is an adult version of Apples to Apples. Definately not for the younger set. The game has the Card Czar read a question and the other players choose a card from thier hand as the answer. The CC then decides which one is the winner and awards Awesome Points. 

This, my friends, is my kind of game. I can be witty, relevant and win Awesome Points.

We were playing and laughing. Everything was going fine.

Until, you knew there was an until, my daughter played the card queef. That's right queef. Then Dad asked, what is that? She plainly explained that it was a vaginal fart. He then went on to say that was a vart.

At that exact moment I had taken a sip of spicy hot apple cider and started to combust. Cider went up my nose, I thought I was going to throw up. I was laughing so hard I choked and as I was running to the bathroom in total hysterical distress I might have peed. Just a little. The WHOLE time I was laughing... and choking.

In the other room my husband was laughing hysterically.

Oh, mom is SO funny.

But it was. It was so funny. When on earth does your grown daughter and her dad politely discuss the meaning of a vaginal fart at the dining room table? It was like they were discussing the weather.

My combusting liquid exit only tipped it over the edge.

Now, years ago I would have been uber embarrased and probably angry that they had laughed at me. Just mortified. This time though... I just laughed.

Thank you Tina Fey, Sarah Silverman and Amy Poehler for helping me understand that laughing at myself is healing and feels great.

I hope your holiday brought much laughter and that you can also learn to laugh at yourself. It makes life so much better.

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My Latest Real Simple Magazine Tip

I was so excited to get the Tweet from Sarah asking if this was indeed my tip they had printed in the latest issue of Real Simple magazine. Well, there aren't many Jacqueline Wolven's, by golly! We actually have Christmas lights under our cabinets... and they are a pretty effect, especially when the dishes are done!

A Homespun Holiday

We are enjoying our quiet holiday. Good food (too much of it). Good gifts (baseball mitts, a beautiful Eureka Springs necklace, and more). Good family fun (games, movies, catch, and quiet fun). We didn't get the snow I had been tracking for a week, but we are still deep into our simple holiday.

Photos: Our tree, dad with the calender our daughter made for us, and the overflowing stockings from Christmas morning.

Next up we are beginning to plan for 2013 and thinking about all of the possibilities. Right now I am dealing with no disk space left on my Mac... obviously I need to do a little house cleaning before I start diving into 2013.

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Current Obsessions

There are always ideas spinning in my brain. Things I want to try, things I want to do and things I want to buy. Here are my current obsessions.

Planning: I am always on the lookout for a better planner. I am a paper girl when it comes to lists and planning. This planner is currently on my radar for 2013.

If my husband were more social I would host this gathering in a heart beat.

I am thinking of quarterly craft nights hosted in our little town, similar to these. Such an inspiration. Just need to find the space.

I am over the moon with doing embroidery right now, my own designs, and think this might be a look I want to try.

I am loving everything about this magazine.

What are you obsessed about?

Keeping it Simple this Holiday

Simple is in for the holidays this year.  Just a few family gifts, some home made gifts for a few friends, simple comfort food, and activities that warm my soul.

I realized, when I wasn't feeling the big push to celebrate the holidays in a huge way, that I could do it easier. I put up our lovely little tree, am cleaning the rest of the house, but not adding any other decorations other than a little stuffed Santa and mason jars filled with candy canes. 

Shopping got a whole lot simpler. I decided that I didn't have to spend gobs of money on my family, I could choose small things that they would enjoy, I made a few things, and I sent our daughter out to do a little of the shopping for her dad. He had her do a little shopping for me too. It brought it all down to a level that was simpler.

I will be doing quite a bit of cooking, but this year we chose to do a roast which I will actually do in the crock pot, and you can't get easier than that. Some baking, some orange rolls... easy peasy.

We do a lot of fun things during the holidays that make it last for days. We do a puzzle, drive around and look at our towns Christmas lights, walk through the Christmas forest, drink hot chocolate, bake cookies, watch movies, sew, and just hang out together.

Granted, our daughter is in her 20's so we aren't pressured to get the latest toy and those that she wants (iPad and Kitchen Aid Mixer) just weren't in the budget this year. So our festivities are smaller, just like our little house in the woods and our family. Small, but happy.

 

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Tell Me What You Are Doing

I am a girl with a lot of opinions. I know, you are all shaking your heads in agreement to that. I think people should have opinions, there is nothing worse than talking to someone about something you think is important and have them say they don't care. Here's the thing though... I am tired of hearing everyone's opinion on every single thing.

So, what I want is to stop listening. I know. I know. I am an advocate for listening and I will still be, but what I want to listen to is your heart, your goals, your dreams, your vision... not your opinion.

Tell me what you are DOING not what you think about every last thing.

Tell me what you WANT to do.

Tell me where you are GOING.

Just stop telling me what you think about politics, mass shootings, global warming, your neighbor, the economy... unless you are ready to get off your ass and do something about any one of those things. Then I will listen.

I just want to get off the opinion machine. I want to get off the snark mobile. I want to get off the everyone has an answer to the very complex problems in our society. I want to get out of the talking cycle and into the doing cycle.

Are you with me? Are you ready to start talking about your REAL experiences instead of talking about things you aren't doing anything about? I'll be here... and if I start spouting... well, just shut me down. I'll totally understand.

An Atheist Holiday FAQ

I get a lot of questions during the holidays from people unsure of what we, as atheists, celebrate. How do we want to be greeted? Do we send cards? Do we have trees? So, I thought I would do this little atheist holiday FAQ.

Do you celebrate Christmas? We do. I was raised celebrating Christmas in the Santa way, not in the Christ is the Reason way. It is a totally commercial holiday for us, but we enjoy the moment to be with family, share traditions, and give easily to others.

Do you celebrate any other winter holidays? Being raised UU we do. We celebrate Hanukkah to some extent, at least we put up our little menorah and we celebrate solstice, the first day of winter. We don't do Advent, the elf thing (we just didn't grow up with that), go to church on Christmas eve, Kwanzaa, or any of the other holidays.

Do you have a tree? We do, always have. It is just a sparkly wonder that celebrates the memories of family through the ornaments and tradition of putting it up.

Do you have stockings and presents? Yep, big on both.

Do you send cards? Sometimes, when I am not uber lazy.

Do you like to say Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, or something else? Any of it is fine. Our daughter is adamant about having people say Happy Holidays because it is more inclusive and suggests that you are at least aware enough to know that not everyone is a Christian. I really don't care. If you are more comfortable saying Merry Christmas, I won't be offended.

Do you have any religious traditions associated with Christmas? Well, because we feel that most of what Christians believe to be their traditions are actually pagan celebrations we don't attribute any of them to a holy moment. Years ago, when I was about 9, my dad took me to the planetarium and they showed the "star" that Jesus was supposedly born under and said that there was no way it was in December. Most likely April. That was a revelation to me at the time and made me realize later that the traditions are just that, traditions. If others put religious significance towards them that is their right, but I personally do not.

Granted, every atheist is different and I don't purpose to talk for everyone, but I hope this helped just a little. Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, Blessed Solstice - Enjoy your winter holidays with all of those around you.

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