I cuss. Like a motherfucker. Well, not exactly like that, but you know what I mean. I come from a long line of cussing women.
My paternal grandmother was a bar owner in Montana. She lived a very fast life... even for a small town. She had my dad when she was 13 on the kitchen table of the farm house (family member is expected to have been the dad, but no one ever said). She had my uncle a few years later by another man... there were lots of men, I think. And she lived out loud. I only met her a few times - she hated my mom and wasn't afraid to say that - but I loved her and how she took life (however crappy it was) and lived it fully. Cussing all the way.
My maternal grandmother was a witch. No, I am not saying that to sugar coat her being a bitch.. she was that too. No, she practiced black magic and taught my mom and aunt to read tarot cards, inhale the crazy, and cuss a blue streak. She lived with us when I was a baby and apparently fell asleep, drunk, on an upholstered chair when she was babysitting me and we (I) almost died from smoke inhalation. She was moved out shortly after that. Cussing all the way.
My mother, as stated previously, was a bit crazy. Not crazy in the zany funny way, really crazy. But she was brilliant. Really. Off the charts brilliant. I am only sad she wasn't born a man because she probably would have been some amazing beat poet that we read about now longingly. Instead she was a dreadful housewife and published (award winning) poet. Who cussed. Like a sailor. All the time.
So, it is in my DNA and I have, sadly, or proudly (I am not sure how to reconcile this) passed this onto my daughter. We raised her to believe they were just words. And, ladies, they are. Just words. Words that have a power beyond their meaning. I know women who only cuss when they have had one too many drinks. I am sad for them because if you can say what you want sober - well, your life is freer. Sure, I know that people say it isn't lady like. I know that people think that you aren't educated if you cuss them out. But really... when you tell someone to fuck off they know you aren't, well, fucking around.
Note: My Twitter friend in Little Rock sent me this after reading my post. I thought I should share.
Flickr Photo: Japanese Forms
