I told my husband this week that I am no longer interested in debating anyone. After he stopped looking at me like I had turned into an alien I explained. I don't think that debate - online or in person - changes anything. Instead I am turning my power towards education and marketing.
Here is an example: A worker came to our house with his boss who was giving us an estimate to redo our roof (which we can't do, but it was nice to know it needs to be done.). He started in immediately on how it isn't fair that people in our town make so little and all the good old boys own everything and run everything. A rant. I listened... but before I started to scream that he could take some fucking responsibility for his life and stop blaming other people I excused myself and went inside.
What could I have done differently?
I could have shared that he ultimately is responsible for his future. If he wanted better wages he could: take a risk and open his own business, go back to school and get a trained, or he could work with other workers to negotiate for better wages.
He was REALLY caught up in his story. He would not have listened to me - but jsut the first part... that no one owes him anything and he can work with his own future might have been the best marketing tool I could have used in that instance.
Telling him my side, sharing his "pain", or even just listening wasn't getting anywhere. He is a middle aged white man in America who thinks life isn't fair. Whine. Debating him is a waste of my energy and time.
So, I quit. I am no longer interested in your excuses. I am no longer interested in debating the existence of your god. I am no longer going to share why you need to be respectful of our president. I am no longer going to "share" why you might be wrong... because you aren't listening. You have your idea what is right.
Instead I am going to focus my energy on doing good work, educating those that are interested, and marketing good tools for growth.
That's it. Gavel down. Debate over. I am moving on.
Flickr Photo: Asfart
