It is when I am sick that I realize I am not my best self. Tuesday night I was attacked by the worst allergy season ever - the pollen invaded and won. For several days I have barely been vertical; preferring the comfort of my bed and the distraction of sleep over the itchy eyes, runny nose, and aching head. I have gone through an entire box of Kleenex and two rolls of toilet paper (substitute for when the Kleenex ran out). I canceled appointments, didn't go to events, and although I feel better today I still sound like a sniffling toddler.
But it is in this dazed and foggy minded moments that I realize that I am not my best self. I am whiny. I am pitiful. And boy, am I short tempered.
I told my husband that he had no patience only to realize when the words were rolling out of my mouth that it was I who have no patience. (The ironic part is that this happened just as I was getting ready to watch the much anticipated The Buddah on PBS. Yep, life is really obvious like that to me.)
Why is it that we are at our noblest when we are feeling good, life is going good, and we are unencumbered? As soon as you change one of these and we slide back to the reptilian self - not our best and not the who we want to be. It is in that moment where we see the split happening (the angry words, the complaining, the wanting whatever we don't have at this moment) that we can catch it. Be quiet with it and know that even this will pass. Oh, please let this pass.
Photo Credit: Robert in Toronto
