My daughter recently wrote a letter to our UU congregation on our Yahoo Group List. She wanted to know what compels them to attend our fellowship. She is taking a religion course at Hendrix College and at the end she will have to write her faith statement. She grew up 3rd generation UU and although she loves the ideals of it, she isn't always in love with it in practice. The bitterness, the unkindness, the pettiness - which ALL churches experience - can be difficult to take even for the most cynical of us.
What she wanted to know is not the responses that she got. There were exactly three - one said that they had not experienced the unkindness that she wrote about, one did and one just called her idealistic.
They missed the point - she wasn't trying to blame them for anything. She just wants to know why they go to church.
We, for a million reasons, have not gone in over two years on any regular basis. I am lucky if I make 3 services a year. Which is a huge shift in my spiritual and community life. I slowly started to give it up while I was care-taking for my dad. I just couldn't listen to the "how is he" statements when he was fading in the hospital for six months. I was going through a devastating time and unfortunately the community that I had invested in was not where I found comfort. Truth be told, I didn't want comfort.
So, we drifted out of the habit. After attending services for 12 years straight at three Unitarian churches I felt I had done my duty to the organization and faith that I hold dear. And yet, like my daughter, I am curious why people go. What feeds you? Why do you choose to attend rather than devour the Sunday paper in bed?
If you don't go, why not? What is missing for you?
